I want to run.

The rain is coming down and I want to run out into it with you.
I want you to pull me close and kiss me.
I want the fairytale.

I want the soggy hand holding.
The water dripping from your hair into my eyes.
I want that moment where we stand face to face and fall in love.

I want to run free in love with you.
That’s what I want.

I know we are not the same.
I know that we are different and want different things.
I know you are irritated and annoyed with my meltdowns.
I know that I’m not easy to love when I’m like this.

All it would take is an embrace that I didn’t initiate.
I can’t initiate them anymore.
I’m afraid.
For if you pull away again, the pain in my chest… it’s making me sick.

This love could kill me.